We, as a society, cannot read signs.

Just as the title suggests, I've come to the conclusion that the vast majority of us cannot read signs most of the time.

And this doesn't just mean street signs and store signs, but also some of the less obvious signs conveyed to us by our friends, family members and even strangers on the street.

Now, I know some of you are sitting there thinking "I don't understand what he's talking about - signs are pretty obvious and you'd have to be an idiot to miss most of them."

Well, my friends, we are indeed a society of idiots. For example, just today I saw a woman back out of her parking spot and proceed to exit the parking lot through the entrance, which was marked by a large sign in red lettering that read "NOT AN EXIT."

As soon as I exited the parking lot the correct way, I witnessed someone run a stoplight, followed by a college student riding her bike in front of me while I turned because she didn't read the bright orange "don't walk" sign on the street light.

I really think drivers/pedestrians are the biggest violators of what you could call "sign law." I've seen more people ignore signs while driving than anything else.

However, what bothers me the most is that when these people disregard what the signs indicate the people who have the right of way are still the ones who end up suffering.

Case in point: A couple of years ago, a student on the University of Illinois campus was killed when she walked right out into a crosswalk and WALKED INTO A BUS. Yup. Walked right into the side of a bus and was killed.

First of all, how do you miss a bus? I mean, really? It's big, makes noise and is pretty visible unless you're Helen Keller or Stevie Wonder.

The bus driver not only couldn't continue her job and was forced to leave, but she has had psychological problems ever since. Yes, it's sad that someone lost her life, but given how stupid you have to be to walk into and be run over by a bus, she wasn't exactly trying hard too hard at self-preservation.

Now, what if that girl had lived? I guarantee she and her family would have sued the University and the Mass Transit District and won, even though she's the one who used the crosswalk improperly (note to all you pedestrians, just because motorists have to yield at crosswalks doesn't mean if a car is about to cross through it, you have the right to run out in front of them. If you do this to me, I will hit you and proceed to ask you what the hell you were thinking while you writhe in pain as I dial 9-1-1).

Just think, all this could have been prevented by paying attention to signs. The sign of bus conveyed by the sounds it makes and its large presence. The "don't walk" sign that was likely blinking. Be smart, people - put your phone down for a second and realize where you are.

Similarly, my very own brother fell victim to someone who couldn't read a stop sign on his recumbent bicycle (those bikes where you sit back like a chair and pedal). My brother was preparing to turn right onto another street when out of the corner of his eye, he saw this cyclist run the stop sign and run right into the side of his truck.

The oblivious cyclist proceeded to berate my brother for being in HIS way even though my brother had the right of way. Luckily for my brother, a police officer witnessed the entire thing. He stopped and approached the cyclist and informed him he would be ticketed for running a stop sign and, if he didn't stop, thrown into the squad car for verbally assaulting my brother (note to cyclists, if you don't know already, you have to follow the exact same rules of the road as automobile drivers, so if you pull out in front of me on your bicycle and I don't see you and I hit you, it's your fault - not mine. Please, pay attention).

However, I digress; the point is, I really wish people would consider for a moment that there are other people around them and signs directing them where to go/what to do when they think "I'm going to run that red light," or "I'm going to cross the street without looking." All it takes is paying attention to ones surroundings and being aware of things like flashing lights and florescent signs.

Anyway, switching gears a little bit, sometimes the signs we miss aren't as subtle as a blinking light or a brightly-painted surface. In fact, sometimes the signs we miss are in the way things are said or displayed in the body language of our friends/family/those around us.

What's more, many times these signs are often indicative of wants or wishes could help a situation one might be experiencing.

My marriage, for example, is full of those times when what is being or has been said isn't always exactly what's being said.

Some easy ones are when I'm on my computer or on the Xbox and she says to me "you should put that away," is usually another way of saying "lets watch some TV together on the couch."

However, there also some not-so-easy to understand signs I've received, whether they have come in the form of a tone of voice suggesting frustration (with me, or otherwise) or a specific body language that hints of anxiousness.

To be honest, discerning these not-so-simple signs has been a growing experience for me. As I come upon my second year of marriage, I've been lucky enough to learn from the instances in which I was unable to read the signs, if only to be able to read them clearly the next time.

Each time I have to endure the failures in my recognition of these signs, I am offered a way to see it more clearly the next time it shows its face, even if it is slightly different than the last time.

The caveat to this is, I have to be willing to see these signs when there is a next time, for the purpose of there being a next time. Because if I ignore the signs after I've seen the consequences of doing so, there will come a time when I will pay with more than just an upset wife.

On a similar level, our friends and family and even the strangers we interact with on a daily basis, have subtle ways of exhibiting outward signs.

Take a day to yourself and spend some time people watching at the mall or in a very public place and just try and determine what the body language or facial features of the people passing by may indicate.

You may see some people who are having the best days of their lives by all accounts. In the same regard, you may see some people who are struggling to put on the faces they are showing.

What you do with those signs is up to you. Perhaps you know someone who is showing signs that are a cry for help, and all you need to do is offer yourself as a shoulder or an ear. Maybe a frustrating situation for a friend while offer a sign to you that you can lend a hand to solve the problem.

Whatever the case, the more we notice the signs around us, the better equipped we will be to address them.

I'm not saying we're always going to see the signs we are meant to see - whether they are obvious or not. We are, after all, only human and flawed ones at that.

However, if we make an effort to be more attentive in our daily routines and thorough in our personal lives as we work on our relationships, the signs we notice will increase over time.

And, hopefully, our lives will be better for it.

A Skewed Perspective and Clear Choice

Call me sentimental, call me soft or call me a liar (you may all be correct), but I find that more now than ever in my life, I really enjoy seeing the individuals who were written off "early in the race," so to speak, doing well in life and showing how flawed socioeconomic stereotypes are in our country.

For example, while I was growing up and even as I worked at the newspaper, the trailer park in Mahomet - Candlewood Estates - was considered to be the "bad side of town," and where "all the bad kids" came from.

Many of the families who lived there when I grew up in Mahomet and during the time I worked there (which is in the very recent past) were and are considered to be low-income families. In the same regard, their children are considered to be "high-risk" based on the environments in which they live.

I won't lie; I know Candlewood has certain aspects about it that would make some people reading this go "see - that's exactly why it's a bad place." It DOES have drugs; it DOES have abuse; it DOES have crime.

But that's not the point, because unfortunately for us (and those who are short-sighted enough to believe only "bad parts of town" have bad things happen in them) we live in a society surrounded by these things. These are not isolated incidents.

The point is, we can't see the forest for the trees. Because of the stigma we have allowed ourselves to associate with certain areas such as low-income qualified housing complexes, trailer parks and even slums, we are also allowing ourselves to be blind to potential, and this often robs those who need our caring and understanding the most of the experience and guidance we have to offer: The children.

As cliche as that may sound (lord knows I've mocked the 'will someone PLEASE think of the children' phrase), it has never been more true for our country. As much as we would like to write children from "troubled" areas off, as members of the society they live in and that we have created for the, it is our duty to do what we can IF we can.

The question then becomes, where do we start? Well, in my opinion, the best place to start such is with ourselves. How do our views affect how we see people? How do they affect how we treat people? Do we even notice?

These are questions I often ask myself when I encounter certain situations - many times in public places like stores or restaurants - in which one person obviously considers him or herself better than another (i.e. a wealthy diner acting rudely towards a waitress or a shopper showing an attitude towards the clerk at the counter or shoppers he/she feels to be of a lesser background).

Far too many of us seem to have the notion that based on our levels of education, our backgrounds, our current situations (often financial) or otherwise, we are better than others around us. Others such as the families who live in Candlewood.

We see trailers and think "they must not be smart enough to own a real house." Then we see their children and automatically assume "they're probably trouble makers," or "that kid is going nowhere fast."

We say these things not because we know, but because it's the easy thing to say based on how society has told us we should treat people: The wealthy get our respect and those who are not wealthy do not deserve it. In the same regard, the better off the family, the better off their children will be.

Well, here is a newsflash to those of you who believe this: You. Are. Naive.

I've said this before and I will say it again because I believe it so fervently: Rich does not mean smart and destined to be successful, nor does poor/middle class mean stupid and going nowhere. This is something that irritates me to no end.

I cannot tell you how many conversations I've heard or been part of in which someone says "well, those kids in the trailer park, they're just bad news." What an ignorant, self-righteous statement.

Yet people make them every day about children who can no more help their situations than we can help the growth of our own toenails. They make them with the expectations of being right and without the intention of stopping for a second and considering what they could do to help things turn out different.

In reality, all it takes for us to impact the lives of these children is to believe in them and act as the role models they may need or the ear they seek that will listen or the wisdom they seek when trying to make a decision. You could be that person. You could be the person who shows a child written off as a "never kid" - who will "never" do this or "never" do that - that he or she can do great things. You would be surprised how far that will go.

I'd like to list myself as an example. As a child, I was the son of a mechanic and a secretary in a town full of parents who were doctors, lawyers and business owners. I didn't wear a pair of Nike shoes until I was in sixth grade and even then, I shared them with my brother. I had mediocre grades due to ADHD and some of the worst acne a kid can have at that age. Needless to say, I was a target for the "socially superior" to tear me down.

I experienced first-hand what it's like to be tormented and teased because of what I didn't have and what people didn't think I was capable of. There came a point when I was in junior high that my parents received a note from the administrators stating I was "in danger of being a high school dropout."

However, I was fortunate enough, through all of this, to have wonderful people around me who believed in what I was capable of, even if they didn't know what it was yet. They lent me their ears when I had questions, offered me their wisdom when they saw I needed it and encouraged me when I didn't feel I had no potential.

Those are the kind of people we need to be, for the sake of not only their future, but our own. There is a reason our society progresses (if you ask me, anyway): Because we allow our perspectives and expectations to progress and our understanding to grow.

It's so easy to look at someone who is rich and affluent and think "they must really have it together." And that would be an appropriate thought if this were a perfect world. But it's not a perfect world and in this imperfect world, even the affluent have problems.

For example, Mahomet is considered to be a very wealthy area, full of professionals who have their act together and lead normal lives. For many people in Mahomet, Candlewood is the sore spot on an otherwise perfect apple.

However, despite this belief, members of the "affluent" part of the Mahomet community (i.e. everything that isn't the trailer park or the Lake of the Woods apartments) experience the same things as the people they judge without knowing.

Here are things that happen outside of Candlewood Estates that I know of for a FACT: Drug sales and use; infidelity; abuse; theft; cheating; alcoholism; underage drinking; vandalism; pornography; - the list could go on.

I'll admit it, for a long time, I believed I was better than the people of Candlewood because I didn't live there and they did. That's it. I believed this because it seemed to me - at the time anyway - as the way things were meant to go. My friends treated the kids who lived there poorly and because I didn't know any better (and never bothered to ask my parents), I followed suit. I try to regret very few things in life, but I do regret how I treated some of my fellow classmates.

Fortunately, I had the excuse of being young and dumb. As an adult, I know better. Others my age - and older - do not, and that saddens me.

It doesn't matter WHERE you live - in a million-dollar home or in a trailer - life happens and so do the bad things that come with it. Even the things we would rather deny than accept. And worst of all? The ones who suffer the most are the ones who have the most potential to change the outlook and build a stronger community.

So, the question still remains: Where do we start? Simple: You start with yourself. One person may not be able to change the entire world, but one person does have the potential to change the world for a child with the simple gift of encouragement.

I will always recall this from a conversation I had with a friend of mine, because it is so fitting for discussions like this, but we always remember two kinds of people from our past: Those who encouraged us and those who looked down on us.

Which one do you want to be remembered as? And are you willing to do what is necessary to be the right one?

Final Mahomet Citizen Column - The Best Is Yet To Come

I've been pondering how I would write this column for the last couple of days, and have found that there are far more things to say about my experience in Mahomet than would fit into this, my final column for the Citizen.

However, I've never been one to let word limits get in the way of what I hope is a shared feeling and message.

For nearly a year and a half I've tried to share with you the parts of me I think reside in everyone. I think there are basic components to everyone that allow us to be so caring, understanding, resourceful and resilient and I think part of me hoped that by sharing these things about myself, those of you reading my columns would try to find what brought these things out in you.

I do know that as a community, Mahomet is all of those things and more. I've had the enormous honor to learn about this community from the inside out over the last year and a half and I can safely say, I learned more about Mahomet in that time than I learned in the 15 years that I lived here. For that, I cannot express enough gratitude.

There are people in this community on all levels that I would like to thank, but to be honest, it would take more space than is in this entire newspaper.

For those of you who I have interacted with, for every story I've written and every interview I've done, I've been able to see the very thing I became a journalist to see - the human condition and the struggles, triumphs and excitement contained within a single community.

I'll be honest, it was hard for me to not see Mahomet as a bedroom community when I first started, because that was what I knew about Mahomet coming into things.

Even now, there are residents who believe Mahomet is nothing more than a bedroom community, which may be true, but only half true, if anything.

The other side of that truth is, there is a community growing in so many directions it doesn't know which one is best. While that may seem like a slight, I encourage you to see it as the enormous potential that your community not only has, but the potential that you as a resident have to have your hand in that growth.

I've never been somewhere that a community was so engaged in its own future and even now, you've only begun to scratch the surface of where you can go. Being part of that and being able to see that is just awesome.

I would also like to thank the various public officials for the chance to cover and - in many cases - have a say in the direction things should go. The things I have learned from those experiences alone have been worth so much.

Finally, I would like to thank the readers - the ones who liked what I had to say, didn't like what I had to say and were kind of enough to speak up when they believed there was something to be said - for showing me what community journalism means.

It's one thing to write a story, which I enjoyed, but to be able to invest in the community emotionally and to see the feelings of those stories and be involved with conveying them on the pages is something special for me.

I can safely say that I will always believe one of the things that makes a great story is believing in the people you are writing about and believing in what they have to say.

While I am currently unsure of what my future holds, I would like to compare my situation to that of the village itself (if only loosely): We know the future holds something great for us - even if we aren't sure what it is yet - and we can't wait to get there.

Thank you for allowing me to be part of such a wonderful process, Mahomet. And remember, whether you can see what the future holds or not, always enjoy the view.